Wrong again,
Father I hate to tell you this,
you taught me how to hit the mark
and once again I've missed
Touch the fire you would always said I'd get burned
Why is it so hard to remember
all the lessons I have learned

How can look that way
when I have failed so many times
Showing me love, you tell the world,
"This child is mine."
How can you walk that extra mile,
I see forgiveness in your smile
So sure you'd regect me,
Wrong again.


Once again,
Lord I have wandered from Your path
Thought I knew a better way,
falling short of what you've asked
Standing here
I don't deserve a second chance
And I can't conseal the shame I feel,
it's more then I can stand

How can you look at me that way
when I have failed so many times
Showing me love, you telling the world,
"This child is mine."
How can you walk that extra mile,
I see forgiveness in your smile
Should you desert me,
Wrong again.

When I look into your face,
and see the power of your grace
I find it so hard to believe,
forgiveness that you're showing me
I see the answer in your eyes
Love and mercy relized
Finally truth has set me free

How can you look at me that way
when I have failed so many times
Showing me love, you tell the world,
"This child is mine."
How can walk that extra mile,
I see forgiveness in your smile
I thought you would scold me,
Instead you just hold me
Thought you would judge me,
Instead you just love me
So sure you would regect me,
Wrong again.

Tomorrow...
I don't want to come back to this house.
I want to run.
And never stop.
Till my heart stops beating
my tears are overflowing.
Not hating myself may become a crime.
and loving you feels like a sin.
I just want to sit in the rain,
under that old willow tree.
Close my eyes,
i won't see my face.
And,
i'll be at home...

Su-lynn: Victoria, are you jealous that Miley was dating Nick?
Me: No. Why would i? She sounds like a duck.


Yea. A really successful one. How could i even judge someone. How could i. Not only that, what right have i? She's way more talented than me and successful. The world is such a scary place, how people manipulate and scheme their way to success, and yet they forget the little people that help them along the way... It changes them, causing them to forget their friends... They become someone else. I realize my place in this world. I'm so insignificant amongst the people who are somebody's and have their fufilled their dream. And me? I'm here, failing my subjects though trying very hard and i'm a significant nobody. My parents and God have blessed me with so much and this is all i can give them, my ugly report card. I am a disgrace. I am sorry i am so useless. I am sorry i can't play the piano well. I'm sorry i'm not responsible enough... I've tried. I know i did. It's not good enough as it seems, but i'm going to keep trying... I'll tell them today so i can endure... endure... I let you down... I'm sorry... I just need to keep telling myself... Looks like i am entirely to blame... Useless child.


Me: Miss Lau, can i go to the toilet please?
Miss Lau: Is it the really urgent type?
Me:(Nods)
Miss Lau: Okay.


I thought i wouldn't step back in the class again.
I wanted to run, run and accidently fall over the corridor railing...
Fall...
fall...
down.
I've lost.
I've lost.
I have lost.


Why is everyone smiling when she's crying?

I was just wondering how people can be so judgemental they want this but are particularly looking for that. On friday the whole class was talking about American Idol and something i couldn't help but overhear was the Jonas Brothers performance. I agree it definitely it wasn't their best, but they tried. I could barely hear Joe sing much but i kinda guessed he was sick after touring so much. Nick too didn't look all too good. I'm not trying to stand up just for the Jonas Brothers but i'm just being frank, how perfect do you expect people to be? They really are human beings after all aren't they? I just don't get it sometime. You perfect people. I'm feeling terrible about my paper, my results to come and the fact that Val Chia was exclaiming 'I ROCK!' for reasons our class people know. Val, putting this nicely, I feel like stangling you. You are so NOT helping. I'm feel like a failure. I'm trying but it's not there yet. I'm studying. STUDYING!!! I can't expect results immediatly but i want them. Now. NOW. NOW!!! I need them. I got nothing else... Nothing achieved to be proud of. Pathetic creature. Eli-chan and Justina thanks for taking me out for lunch today. I was on the brink of crying in the bus, but you guys really made the sadness go away. :) Love you guys. Now, tomorrow. I scared of you tomorrow. When the tears flow down my eyes, will they cry with me or say 'Who cares. I did better.' It's becoming that way. Will they look at me and say, 'This child is mine.' or do they just walk away? I want to go. Away, where everything is okay and O level scripts don't have bloody barcodes...




I feel so unworthy... this person that you see, are you sure you are in love with me?... Maybe i'll join the stars tonight, they seem to shine so bright...

My birthday was pretty okay. I had the family over on saturday so that was swell. :) At least no one to upset me. I didn't get many presents, but I must say they were all pretty great. :) Yup yup. Thanks for the present Robin! I love it! :D My birthday also showed me who my real friends were cause obviously the ones who didn't really see me as important friend, completely forgot it was my birthday. It's okay, at least I know I still have the people who care about me. :) You have no idea how much you guys are to me... I saw Iron Man yesterday and Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian today, due to some VERY unforseen consequences that i ended up going to watch the movie in my unsightly home clothes. Thank goodness mummy dear was nice enough to but me a pair of jeans. (I almost scammed her to buy a pair of Ralph Lauren jeans that cost 399 after discount. DANG!) XD I think Iron Man was totally AWESOME and Tony Stark is SO SMART. It's SO HOT!!! XD The movie was so awesomely FUN! So exciting. Narnia was expected. The usual. The theater was full of kids (NOISY AND CONSTANTLY PLAYING WITH THEIR HANDPHONES!!!) especially and because it was free sitting, we didn't get too good seats at all. And the was chinese work to be done at home to waiting... Ack. But it was NICE. DUH. I think King Edmund was TOTALLY SO MUCH HOTTER than before and Prince Caspian was CUTE TOO. XD My mum agrees readily. I'm quite bummed Susan got to kiss the prince in the end, but i saw it coming. They had the little something something going on during the movie, clearly. The mouse was quite adorable too! I'm kinda sad Aslan only appeared towards the end, well i guess they gotta learn to be independent! :P And there were times in the movie you'd just want to stretch your arm into the movie screen and slap the 'Majestic King Peter'. That BOY!!! Gosh. But overall both movies were really GREAT. I'd watch both again. Yes yes! Gotta sign out. Much unfinished chinese buisness to attend to. :(

Yes the mid years are over, but there's still chinese to go. Crap. O's. We all are given double load of work over the weekend. WHY THE HELL DOES IT HAVE TO BE THIS WEEKEND???!!! WHY COULDN'T IT HAVE BEEN LAST WEEK. Again today, lao shi picked on and Meera, what's new? I totally wanted to dent her face or send her to oblivion. She kinda spoiled my 'Yay what i studied came out for SS even though i spent most of yesterday night watching AMI. (Mostly Archuletta) XD' mood. SO ANNOYING. TMTH. Can't wait till I needn't see her irrinoying face again. Up till now, she can't get my name right. But i don't bother to correct her anymore. Screw -. I'm freezing in the library waiting for the little munchkin to finish her MEP stuff with Miss Sian who i must say, really knows how to waste time. And the finally i can hit Orchard and EAT. YES, GOSH. I'm STARVING today. Coco crunch wasn't enough. Oh yea, i think student forum was pretty interesting today with the 'The primary school girls make a mess of the table', 'The primary school girls go into the same cubicle', I heard a primary school girl say 'I hate having recess with the secondary school girls, they are so annoying.' Obviously you know who we were all out to get. XD I can't say i disagree, the primary school girls aren't really like what we used to be. And I really like the fact that Mrs Ong accompanied with Mrs Yap and Miss Bong, actually attended and answered our questions. Well done! :) I'm sure that'll be tops with the students. As far as i recall, Miss Kon NEVER EVER EVER did that once. Not being biased. Just factual. Oh wells, tomorrow is the day. Shucks, i feel older already. I hope i won't be subjected to the torture I experienced last year. I'll make my own way to Orchard and shop the whole day otherwise. :P THE JONAS BROTHERS ARE PERFORMING ON THE AMERICAN IDOL FINALE!!! OMJ!!! XD





Counting, I'm counting. Waiting, waiting. I want to count the stars with you...

Mid-years are breathing down my neck.
The words on my textbook can't take me.
My maid is a pain in the ass.
My hormones are retarded.
My face is screwed.
Well I am screwed.
I hate this.
I HATE this.
I HATE THIS.
And I REALLY HATE this post.

Yea. I just saw the movie today despite there being Chinese prelims tomorrow and bio SPA skill 3. I'm compressing my schedule real tight. I really enjoyed the movie. It was really awesome and touching. I thought the guy who played Amanda Bynes boyfriend was really cute. He reminded me a bit of David Archuletta but the Brit version and probably a little less small boy cute. Yup. I was totally like all over him. :D Guilty as charged. Haha. Well... Idk. He could sing and play the guitar, what's not to like? But i love the setting of the show though. It was sooo beautiful!!! It just kept reminding me why i want to go overseas or migrate if i could, so badly. Nature is just amazing... You barely get it much in Singapore so eww. I shall make sure when i get married, it'll be overseas, somewhere gorgeous. And maybe i should stay there. :D Maybe i'll be able to find the JoBros before it's too late. Hehe! XD Oh well, i'll keep dreaming. I really gotta run now and my sister, well is going gaga over DBSK AGAIN. No idea how i'm gonna study. Good luck to 4Mmers and my other friends tomorrow! We can work it out! :)



I can't wait for the day i'll be able to hold you in my arms without being afraid of anything and with nothing standing in our way...